Always use the words ‘Africa’, ‘ Darkness’, or ‘Safari’ for your name. Subtitles can also encompass the words ‘Zanzibar,’ ‘Masai,’ ‘Zulu,’ ‘The Zambezi,’ ‘Congo,’ ‘Nile,’ ‘Big,’ ‘Sky,’ ‘Shadow,’ ‘Drum,’ ‘Sun’ or ‘Bygone.’ Also useful are phrases with ‘Guerrillas,’ ‘Timeless,’ ‘Primordial,’ and ‘Tribal.’ Note that ‘People’ are Africans who aren’t black, while ‘The People’ are black Africans. Never have a photograph of a properly-adjusted African on the quilt of your e-book, except that African has gained the Nobel Prize. An AK-47, distinguished ribs, bare breasts: use those. If you should include an African, ensure you get one in Masaiu, Zulu,, or Dogon. Get dressed.
In your text, treat Africa as if it has been one u. S. A. It is warm and dusty with rolling grasslands, big animal herds, and tall, skinny individuals starving. Or it is hot and steamy, with very few people who eat primates, so don’t get bogged down with specific descriptions. Africa is huge: fifty-four countries, 900 million who are too busy ravenous, dying, warring, and emigrating to study your ebook. The continent comprises deserts, jungles, highlands, savannahs, and plenty of other things. However, your reader does not care about all that, so maintain your descriptions as romantic, evo,cative, and unparticular.
Please make certain you show how Africans have track and rhythm deep inside their souls and eat things no other people devour. Do no longer point out rice, red meat, and wheat; monkey-brain is an African cuisine of choice, along with goat, snake, worms, grubs, and game meat. Make a positive display thatyou can devour such food without flinching, and describe how you learned ho revel in it because you care. Taboo topics: regular home scenes, love between Africans (until a dying is worried), references to African writers or intellectuals, mention of school-going youngsters who aren’t tormented by yaws Eb, ola fever, or girl genital mutilation. Throughout the ebook, adopt a sotto voice in conspiracy with the reader.
An unhappy I-anticipated-so-much tone. Establish early on that your liberalism is impeccable, and point out close to the start how much you like Africa, the way you fell in love with the place and can not live without her. Africa is the best content you can love — take advantage of this. If you’re a guy, thrust yourself into her heat virgin forests. If you’re a girl, deal with Africa as a man wearing a bush jacket and disappearing into the sunset. Africa is to be pitied, worshipped, or ruled. Whichever perspective you take, be sure to leave the strong influence that Africa is doomed without your intervention and your critical e-book.
Your African characters may also consist of bare warriors, unswerving servants, diviners and seers, historic sensible guys dwelling in hermitic splendor. Or corrupt politicians, inept polygamous tour publications, and prostitutes you’ve slept with. The Loyal Servant always behaves like a seven-year-old and wishes for a company hand; he’s terrified of snakes, precise with children, and always related to you in his complex domestic dramas. The Ancient Wise Man usually comes from a noble tribe (now not the cash-grubbing tribes just like the Gikuyu.
The Igbo or the Shona). He has rheumy eyes and is near the Earth. Modern African is a fat guy who steals and works within the visa office, refusing to provide painting permits to qualified Westerners who virtually care about Africa. He is an enemy of improvement, constantly using his government activity to make it tough for pragmatic and exact-hearted ex-pats to install NGOs or Legal Conservation Areas. Or he is an Oxford-knowledgeable intellectual who became a serial-killing flesh-presser in a Savile Row fit. Finally, he is a cannibal who likes Cristal’s champagne, and his mother is a rich witch-doctor who, in reality, runs the USA.
Among your characters, you must always encompass The Starving African, who wanders the refugee camp nearly bare and waits for the benevolence of the West. Her youngsters have flown on their eyelids and pot bellies, and her breasts are flat and empty. She has to appear wholly helpless. She does not have any beyond no records; such diversions spoil the dramatic second. Moans are correct. She needs to say something about herself inside the talk besides talking about her (unspeakable) struggle.
Also, be sure to include a heat and motherly female with a rolling snigger who is concerned about your well-being. Just call her Mama. Her children are all delinquent. These characters must buzz around your fundamental hero, making him look true. Your hero can educate, shower, and feed them; he includes many babies and has seen Death. Your hero is you (if reportage) or a beautiful, tragic global celeb/aristocrat who now cares for animals (if fiction). Bad Western characters may include kids of Tory cupboard ministers, Afrikaners, and personnel of the World Bank. When speaking about exploitation by using foreigners, mention the Chinese and Indian traders. Blame the West for Africa’s scenario. But do now not be too particular.
Broad brushstrokes at some stage are correct. Avoid having the African characters chortle battle to train their youngsters or make do on mundane occasions. Instead, have them light up something about Europe or America in Africa. African characters need to be colorful, distinguished, and larger than life — but empty inner, not using a speak, no conflicts or resolutions in their tales, and no depth or quirks to confuse the motive.